Most people never pick up the phone. They never call or ask. And that’s what sometimes separates the doers from the dreamers. You have to act. You have to be willing to fail.
When Steve Jobs was 12 years old, he wanted to build a frequency counter, but he was missing some of the parts needed to complete the project.
Instead of giving up, however, he did the only thing he could think of: he looked up Bill Hewlett’s number in the phone book and called him.
Much to Steve’s surprise, Bill, co-founder of Hewlett Packard, personally answered the phone. After Steve explained who he was and what he was doing, Bill agreed to give him some spare parts for his project.
Not only that, but he also gave Steve a summer job at HP putting nuts and bolts on the assembly line building frequency counters.
Sharing this story in 1994 with the Silicon Valley Historical Association, Jobs emphasized the importance of asking for what you want:
“Most people never pick up the phone. Most people never call and ask. And that’s what sometimes separates people who do things from people who just dream about them. You have to take action. You have to be willing to fail. You have to be willing to get burned. With people on the phone or starting a company, if you’re afraid of failing, you’re not going to get very far.”
Throughout my career, I have worked with successful entrepreneurs, coaches, and creatives. These people are spread across the globe and come in many different shapes and sizes.
However, like Jobs, the one characteristic they all have in common is that they know that no one is coming to save them and that it is up to them, and them alone, to go after what they want.
When most people think about taking a risk, they get paralyzed by thinking about all the negative things that could happen.
They allow their internal dialogue to be flooded with statements such as “What if?”, “What if they reject me?”, “What if they laugh at me?” and “What if I’m not ready?”
However, people who make an impact silence their doubts by focusing on the potential positive outcomes: “What if they say yes?” “What if they know a friend who can help me?” “What if this is my big chance?”
They do this because they know that the old adage «Good things come to those who wait» is outdated.
People who get what they want have the balls to ask for what they want.
Steve Jobs and Elon Musk both began their careers by asking for what they wanted. Jobs wanted some spare parts and ended up with a summer job. Musk cold-called people he wanted to meet and, after getting on the radar of Peter Nicholson, a senior executive at the Bank of Nova Scotia, was offered an internship where he went on to pitch Nicholson ideas.
It’s easy to look at change-makers like Jobs and Musk and say to yourself: “It’s easy for them. They’re geniuses.”
To encourage you to put aside your doubts and pick up the phone, here are some stories of people you pass by every day who decided that their dreams were more important than a moment of potential embarrassment.
For 15 years, my friend Brian Pennie was addicted to heroin. But a few years after getting clean, he decided he wanted to ask leaders in his home country of Ireland to help him spread his message that change is possible.
From billionaires and CEOs of multinational companies to athletes and politicians, every week Brian would sit down and send them a message.
It should come as no surprise that some people have said no.
81 percent of people, however, said yes.
Since then, Brian has gained a huge following on social media, published his first book, Bonus Time, and is currently in talks for a TV show about his life and the tactics he used to change it.
Brian picked up the phone.
A month ago, Flynn Blackie, a 17-year-old Scottish boy, emailed me requesting a speaking opportunity.
The next day, we spoke on the phone and he told me point-blank: «Michael, I want you to write about what I’m doing. In exchange, I’ll help you with your marketing. Do you see any holes in that request?»
Two weeks ago, I published my first article on Flynn and since then he has added a few new clients to his already massive rolodex.
Flynn picked up the phone.
While walking the Camino de Santiago in Spain, a Norwegian woman came across a man from Holland. It was just a normal encounter with a stranger. They didn’t even exchange names.
Months later, however, the woman, who was 87 at the time, couldn’t shake the feeling that this man was worth getting to know.
So instead of just dreaming about him, she approached the Camino offices and asked for the names of the Dutch people who finished the walk at the same time as her.
Today, the two people are a couple.
Miss Marry picked up the phone.
The world is full of incredibly kind people
When talking about his experience with HP, Steve Jobs said something that stopped me in my tracks:
“I’ve always found one thing to be very true, which is that most people don’t get those experiences because they never ask.”
Jobs continued,
“I’ve never met anyone who didn’t want to help me if I asked them for help.”
Now, not everyone will want to help you. However, in general, from my experience and that of my friends, Jobs is right: the world is full of people who want to help but simply don’t know that you need it.
Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes. However, the one thing they have in common is that they always come from other people.
If you want to make an impact on the world, remember Steve Jobs and pick up the phone.
When it comes to life skills, few things compete with learning how to ask people to support your cause.
